Wednesday, September 9

This month will be a busy one for me. I am currently in El Paso, Texas for work but am receiving constant updates from Holly on John's condition. In the past couple of weeks, evenings are difficult. John will sometimes start being agitated and even get worked up to the point of being confused or having hallucinations. We are told that this is a common occurrence with people who have brain injuries but it is difficult to see John in such emotional and in his mind, physical pain. This is a process and it is a constant reminder that we are far from the finish line in John's journey but his brain continues to heal and it is hard to predict what might happen next.

My room here in El Paso looks out toward the border between Texas and Mexico. I remember the days when it was safe to cross and have a meal or see some sights in Mexico, but Juarez has recently made the news for some barbaric activity so I am content to remain on Texas soil. I look out over the lights and while I know I won't be seeing them up close it seems that John is in the same position. He is in a situation which provides him a safe setting but at the same time precludes him from his prior life. He doesn't seem to be agitated by being at TIRR. He doesn't ask to leave, or seem sad when we leave. He has a spiritual acceptance which I strive for and he seems comfortable and healthy and he has a love for those near him which is unexplainable. He has a level of gratitude which never ceases to amaze me and always reaches out a hand for introductions and often ends conversations with, "Thank you lord", or "I couldn't have done it without you". Needless to say, John remains one of the coolest people I know and I know that from a selfish standpoint I have so much to learn from his path, and my only wish is that our friendship has reciprocity and that I offer him comfort when I am around him in the same way that he does me.