Sunday, November 29, 2009

Thanksgiving week...








This has been an eventful week for John. He started of the week by being moved to a new "facility". The new place is called Mentis and they work specifically with folks who have brain injuries and/or head trauma. The focus now is to help John regain some more of his life skills and independence.

Since June, John has been to 4 different hospitals and facilities. One of the things that Holly and I both noticed about this move was just how much easier this transition and move was from a logisitical standpoint. When we moved from the hospital to Triumph, it took almost an hour just to disconnect John from all the tubes and wires running into his body and we were so nervous that something would go wrong. Then, in the move from Triumph to TIRR there was huge concern that John wouldn't receive adequate nursing because he was being moved from an acute care setting to one with shared nursing staff.

This recent move was simply a matter of loading John's personal stuff and him into Holly's truck and driving him from TIRR to Mentis. Needless to say, it wasn't lost on us just how far John has come over the past 6 months. There is always trepidation with change because we get comfortable at each place knowing that John is stable but so far we have been very blessed that John has consistently received top-knotch care and we have no reason to believe that this won't continue at Mentis. This is a small facility housing no more than 20 patients and each of them have their own room. Residents are encouraged to help with meal preparation and receive occupational and physical therapy throughout the day. The true focus is to enable residents to be able to live more independently so there is a bit of a pulling back of the constant family presence. While we are still very much involved, John is in the process of regaining who he is as a person and as an individual and he is allowed to do so while under the watchful eye of more objective professionals. This is simply the next step in John's magnificent journey!

On Thanksgiving day, John had a pass to leave Mentis and Holly and he spent the day visiting with family. The above pictures of farm animals are at the FHA barn where John and Holly's niece Sydney is raising a goat...(she named the goat JohnJohn!)

Friday, November 20, 2009

November 19...Raffle update

Softball/Raffle Slideshow

The above is a link to photos from the softball tournament and raffle drawing. Thanks so much to Samuel Karnes for putting the pictures together in such an artistic way!

This is a week which helps us to pause and reflect for things we are thankful for. In the course of my life I have seen generosity and been blessed with amazing friends and family members. I have never experienced the level of generosity or outpouring of support like I have seen for John and Holly. I consistently feel lucky to have John in my life and being able to meet people who work with him or know him is a constant reminder of how he has lived his life and a basis for comparison about what it means to live life with compassion and spirit.

Over the past couple of months, there has been a raffle to benefit and help defer John's medical costs. This raffle was spearheaded by Kate Stohl and the drawing was held today. For those of you who purchased tickets, thank you! Holly asked me to post the following on her behalf:
Mel, please post the following:
~ I AM BEYOND TOUCHED AND NO WORDS CAN EXPRESS HOW GRATEFUL I AM TO EVERYONE. I WISH I COULD THANK EVERYONE PERSONALLY. JUST THE TIME AND EFFORT THAT WENT INTO THE WHOLE EVENT AND HOW ASTOUNDING THE AMOUNT OF MONEY THEY RAISED WAS. I ALSO WANT TO INCLUDE THAT THIS WILL HELP SO MUCH WITH HIS CARE. I AM STILL IN SHOCK AT THE AMOUNT THEY RAISED AND AM SOOO BEYOND GRATEFUL…..

I would like to mention that the amount raised was close to $11,000 dollars! We simply cannot tell you how shocked we are and want each of you to know that this money will go directly toward helping John through his coming months of medical care. We are in awe at how hard each person worked to help out John and Holly and words simply cannot express the level of gratitude in our hearts.

November 17 Softball updates!

John getting updates on tournament progress:

T!

SWING TODD, SWING!!!

Relaxing, dugout style!

Hudd's Red Raiders

The Melonballers:

Simply Maria...

Best cheerleaders ever!

Beth selling raffle tickets...

Todd Oliver and his Dad...Yes, his dad played!

Kate Stohl...raffle chairperson extraordinaire!

Guarding the Brackets!

Holly throwing out the first (and second) pitch!

Tina keeping the field in perfect playing condition!

Yay softball!


On November 7, the Spring Branch Health and Fitness Teachers Association held it's 3rd annual softball tournament. This was a tournament that John had been involved with the planning and organizing of and his fellow teachers really stepped up to continue the tradition even adding a bracket for so that John's friends and family could play. The tournament had a bracket for the more advanced players and another bracket for recreational teams and I can tell you that a fantastic time was had by all involved. I should tell you that if you haven't played softball in a few years, or ever, you should expect to be in pain for several days afterward! Most of our players in the recreational bracket reported needing a few days of recuperation but I want to personally thank everyone who participated. I simply cannot express how much fun the tournament was and we are still talking about what a great day it was. Holly threw out the first (and second) pitch at the Memorial field and later left to go to TIRR to see and update John about the days events. Our hope is that next year John will be able to attend and be an integral part of putting the tourney on once again!

Sometimes in life you do things that you think are going to be fun but there are unexpected turns of events which take it to another level. The day of softball was just such a day. There was a sea of red "coaches crew" t-shirts and the vibe at the field was indescribable. All day, I met folks who know John and heard stories about him and his years of teaching at Spring Branch Elementary. There were people there who have overcome similar hurdles in their lives and some of the stories I have heard make me realize that the human condition and resiliency we are given at birth can help us to overcome most anything thrown our way.

There are so many people to thank for making the tournament possible and I want to mention that each of the organizers put their heart and soul into it and made it a complete success. Samuel Karnes was the first to, "Step up to the plate", and put together teams, brackets and fields and his supporting cast of so many who took time out of their busy schedules to lend a helping hand where needed. We are currently in the process of compiling photos from the day from all three fields and I hope to be able to post some more of them soon but if you would like the complete photo catalog, shoot me an email and I will try to get it to you. If you have some pictures you would like included that you haven't forwarded to Samuel, you can do so by emailing him at: Samuel.Karns@springbranchisd.com

Friday, November 13, 2009

November 13...Happy 40th Birthday John!





Today is John's 40th birthday! He entered the world some four decades ago and the world is a better place because of it. John has spent his life bringing smiles to people's faces...family, friends, co-workers and strangers alike and continues to do so. John's co-workers Rebecca, Michelle and Maria came and brought with them some special deliveries...hand-made cards from all of John's students (they are in 6 different binders!), some of John's favorite treats including pop tarts and m&m's, and a Nintendo DS gaming system to help him pass the time. Thanks so much to them and to all of John's friends and co-workers!

I should mention that I am in the process of collecting photographs from the softball tournament and will tell you that it was a huge success and the most fun day of sports (and most painful!) that most of us had in a very long time. The one thing which would have made it perfect would have been for John to be there but we are hopeful that by his 41st birthday, he will.

40 years of life is a milestone and a time to look back and think about what you've done and think about some things that you might want to change about yourself. If statistical information is correct, it marks the approximate halfway point in the average male's life and is supposed to be the place where home, family and health all come together as one to provide a firm foundation for the rest of the years to be spent. But, this is not John's path. His path will require him to hone all skills and strength he has gained throughout his life to fight to complete the second half.

The thing is that he has done absolutely nothing wrong and, in fact, most things right, but for some reason he is left trying to grasp at the minutia in an effort to survive and thrive. There is no explanation as to why this had to happen to him. We think and search and dig but we cannot control it and we aren't driving. There is awe, surprise and at times even anger as we try to grasp for meaning for this unexplainable and horrifying event. Every single thing changed on June 2 for John and everyone connected to him. Each day presents challenges for John. Walking requires effort. Talking requires thought. Memory and sensory perception comes from a place within him...his core and necessitates effort to retrieve.

What seems to not require any effort whatsoever is his continued ability to love and to want others around him to be happy and laugh. When we are with him at mealtime, he always prays before eating and always tries to give us his food. He will offer his food to us many times throughout his meal and seems to feel bad about eating in front of us. He is most happy when we eat too! He constantly tells us thank you and at times tells us to be patient with him. He is at times exceptionally lucid and at other times he is confused...trying to place things in his mind back into their rightful place after the "earthquake" knocked everything off of his mental shelves. This process is laborious for him but you can see him working, and fighting every minute of every day to get back to where he was before the heart attack. If passion and perseverance are the keys to healing, there is little doubt that he will heal. John has always been a hard worker and driven and this situation has simply redirected his drive and focused it on getting better. He gets frustrated at times but seems to take the daily challenges in stride.

There is a statue in front of TIRR which is of a man with arms stretched over his head and he has just broken the chain connecting handcuffs on his wrists. It is a graphic depiction of what John does every day. Each day is a file mark on the metal constraining him and each point of progress gets him closer to breaking the chains holding him back. It is a new favorite piece of art for me personally and when things seem particularly difficult I picture John's face on that statue!

Thursday, November 5, 2009

Softball Update

We are still looking for a few men to play in the softball tournament on Saturday November 7. Please email me if you are available. The teams are going to consist of 5 girls and 5 guys and the girls are covered so we need guys!

Wednesday, November 4, 2009

Saturday October 31


John on his Harley Road King


John coming into the house for the first time since June 2


John and Holly in their living room


John and Paulette's Boston Terrier Chanel...couch time!


John and his neighbor Juan


Paulette and John


Russ, John and Jen, John's neighbors

Believe it or not...these photos were taken today! Over the weekend, John received a day pass from TIRR and was able to leave the facility for a few hours with Holly for the first time since June 2! Holly decided to take him home and hopefully spur his memory a bit about his house and some familiar surroundings. John enjoyed the ride and some much needed couch time and he and Holly got to relax a bit in their home and a couple of the neighbors who had seen them drive up came over to greet John. One of the things Holly has consistently said she misses is just that, "Being at home", feeling. Even if it's watching t.v. or cooking dinner, we can easily forget how that being taken from you would make you miss it. Maybe it's the normalcy or the mundane but since things have been so chaotic, it was a much needed break for both of them.

It is difficult loading and unloading the wheelchair into the truck but for the most part John is able to get in and out of the truck and buckle his seat belt unassisted. John doesn't need the wheelchair all of the time but it's good to have it just in case he gets tired. He is able to walk on his own but we always make sure to be nearby or hold his shirt. At times he seems to feel as if he is going to fall until you remind him to get his balance and try to relax. It's amazing that at this point he has to tell his brain to tell his legs to walk which is something that most of us simply do without any thought. There are times when he feels like he can't do something but usually when we remind him of all he has accomplished, he overcomes his feelings of insecurity.

One of the things which has not changed one iota with John is his friendliness and ability to be grateful. He has such an amazing attitude about this situation and he tells us constantly thank you and that he loves us and takes the time to pray before each meal. His unfaltering faith is beautiful to see and although at times he has bad days and is frustrated, these bad days are becoming less and less frequent. He asks about his situation and he sometimes tells us that he is sick but we remind him that although he has had a heart attack, he is in excellent physical condition and is healing. We tell him to be patient and that all of his emotions are normal. When he is upset or scared we let him know that that is okay and try to reassure him that he is in a place of healing but we also reiterate the need for him to keep on fighting which he seems to do inherently. His drive to get better comes from that inexplicable place deep within. Combine that with the nurturing he receives from the staff at TIRR and from those who love him will and there is little doubt that huge success looms nearby.