In the past week or so, John has continued his recuperation process at TIRR. Therapists have structured his rehab so that it will hopefully not interfere with the leads from his Baclofen pump. They have also begun to adjust the amount of Baclofen which is released from the pump. The idea is that they adjust it and then see how John does and then adjust it again and so on until they obtain the perfect amount for him. It's not an exact science and at this point they have steadily increased it and will continue to tweak it as the weeks pass. John's speech and swallowing have also improved a bit and we are encouraged because it is somewhat better than it was prior to the Baclofen pump placement. Obviously, we are hoping for huge changes with the pump but at this point, it's the little improvements which keep us grateful and hopeful.
In the big picture, his condition has deteriorated over the past few months. I wish it were better news but the fact is that I wish to portray an honest account of what is going on. Essentially, the progress we are making at this point is remedial and although we are happy that he is feeling better, John has had quite a few setbacks and for us to begin gaining ground again will be a wonderful and precious thing.
I have tried to help out with things around John and Holly's house while he has been hospitalized and I recently had something special happen that I wanted to share. I was in the attic about to change their air conditioning filter. This is something I hadn't done before so I truly had no clue how to do it but I knew it was in the attic so I pulled down the ladder, grabbed the new filter and headed up! So, I was looking around with my mini flashlight to figure out where the thing was and how to change it and in the back corner of the attic was a pair of pliers and a screwdriver right below where the filter goes. It was as if John left me this huge clue and the perfect tools to get the job done just in case, and it really choked me up. So, there I was...up in the attic sweating and crying and missing John more than ever. It's not that he is gone of course, he is simply in a different place in his life. The fact that he is so organized in all aspects of his life reminds me of how he has always done so much for others and never wanted to be a bother. We have had many other incidents similar to this one but it was simply so unexpected that it almost felt as though John were right there helping me change that filter. If he had been, he probably wouldn't have let me up that ladder because he knows how damn clumsy I am! I am guessing that he has left many of these clues throughout his life. Maybe they aren't as tangible and maybe they are simply something he has said or done but I would bet that each of us has our own "John reminders". I could only hope that if something catastrophic were to happen to me, I would have my affairs in order enough that those close to me wouldn't have to go through too much trouble.
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